Gavin Strick
Steve Clark
Rachel Wagner
Dorian Newberry
Lorna Longley
Others
Dialogue
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Steve: Tell me, Shannon, do you get yelled at when you talk about your dead grandfather?
Nathan: Steve...
Steve : 'Cause around here, people go crazy if you talk about a dead brother.
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Gavin: Hello Charles, cycle any anabolic goodies lately?
Chug: You're funny, Strick.
Gavin: Thanks, I'm here all week.
Chug:
[to Rachel] Anyways Rachel, there's a couple of us guys going to the Yogurt Shoppe later if you wanna come by...
Gavin: The Yogurt Shoppe? Yeah!
[to Steve] You wanna make an "active culture" joke here, Stevie Boy, or should I handle this one?
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Gavin: No, it is not bullshit, and it wasn't steroids!
Rachel:
[annoyed] Here we go...
Steve: What?
Rachel: Gavin thinks some sinister force has taken over the Cradle Bay meatheads.
Gavin: No, you
know what it is! You
know!
Steve: A sinister force?
Rachel: You know, evil. Nowhere to turn, no one to trust, altogether ooky.
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Gavin: Mr. Newberry here has got the full-on Boo Radley, village idiot, Quasimoto thing going, don't you Mr. Newb?
Dorian: What?
Gavin: And he's currently involved in a war against the rodent population of Cradle Bay.
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Gavin: Look at this place: the Yogurt Shoppe... the Yogurt "Shop-e". What the fuck is a "Shop-e"?
Randi: Why don't you make like a tree and leave?
Gavin: Clever girl.
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Dorian: Evening, Officer!
Officer Cox: What are you doing?
Dorian: Oh, I'm getting rid of rats! The pink-eyed vermin can't see for spit!
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[after Steve begs for the family to head back to Chicago, Dr. Caldicott steps inside the Clark house]
Dr. Caldicott: Steven, you
are home. Cradle Bay is where you belong, here with your family.
Steve:
[realizing he's been betrayed by his mother and father] You signed me up for the program?
Cynthia: We want what's best for you.
Steve:
[screaming] What about what I want??!!
Dr. Caldicott: Steven, do you really like the way you feel?
Steve: Oh, shut the fuck up!
[to his parents] You sold me out.
Cynthia: No, we didn't! We just want you back!
Nathan: Steven, please...
Steve:
[shouting] "Steve!" My name is "
Steve", OK?! Nobody calls me "Steven" except for them!
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[U.V. isn't sure if Steve Clark is now one of the Blue Ribbons]
U.V.: Hey, man, not so fast! What's the capital of North Dakota?
Steve: How the fuck should I know?
U.V.: All right, you're cool.
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Steve: What're you doing?
Dorian: We can't very well let these shitbirds go off and graduate into the world, can we?
Steve: Maybe they can be helped!
Dorian: No, they can't... And neither can I!
[shows the gunshot wound to his stomach] Do good things, lunch boy.
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Steve: It's over, you son of a bitch. It's finished.
Dr. Caldicott: "Finished"? There'll always be other towns. Other troubled teens. Other troubled parents. Science is God!
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Rachel: What happened?
Steve: We're the only ones left.
Rachel: So what do we do now?
Steve: We go home.
Rachel: Where's that?
Steve: Wherever. Wherever we are.
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