Alfie
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It seems to me the problems you worry yourself sick about never seem to materialize. It's the ones that catch you unexpectedly on a Wednesday afternoon that knock you sideways.
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In every doomed relationship there comes what I like to call the "oh oooh"-moment. And a certain little something happens and you know you've just witnessed the beginning of the end. Suddenly you stop and you think: "oh oooh"... iceberg ahead.
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What happens with me is – I don’t know – I get… when it gets too… not close, but something like that, I start to feel… not stifled… not trapped… but, but… something like that and I – you know, you know what I mean.
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I warned them all from the beginning. I always said something along the lines of… I must advise you, I am stamped with an invisible warning: “will not commit”, “will never marry”.
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When I look back on my little life and all the women I’ve known. I can’t help to think about all that they’ve done for me, I hadn’t left up for them, how they looked after me, and cared for me, and I would pay them by never returning the favor. Yeah, I used to think I had the best end of the deal. What have I got… really… some money in my pocket, some nice threads, a fancy car at my disposal, and I am single… unattached, free as a bird. I don’t depend on nobody. Nobody depends on me. My life’s my own. But I don’t have peace of mind. And if you don’t have that, you have nothing. So.. so what’s the answer, I keep asking myself. What’s it all about. You know what I mean.