King Henry II
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In my time I've known contessas, milkmaids, courtesans and novices, whores, gypsies, jades, and little boys, but nowhere in God's western world have I found anyone to love but you.
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I found out the way your mind works and the kind of man you are. I know your plans and expectations - you've burbled every bit of strategy you've got. I know exactly what you will do, and exactly what you won't, and I've told you exactly nothing. To these aged eyes, boy, that's what winning looks like!
Eleanor of Aquitaine
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[to her sons] Oh, my piglets, we are the origins of war, not history's forces, nor the times, nor justice, nor the lack of it, nor causes, nor religions, nor ideas, nor kinds of government, nor any other thing. We are the killers. We breed wars. We carry it like syphilis inside. Dead bodies rot in field and stream because the living ones are rotten. For the love of God, can't we love one another just a little? That's how peace begins. We have so much to love each other for. We have such possibilities, my children. We could change the world.
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I even made poor Louis take me on Crusade. How's that for blasphemy. I dressed my maids as Amazons and rode bare-breasted halfway to Damascus. Louis had a seizure and I damn near died of windburn... but the troops were dazzled.
Prince Richard
Prince Geoffrey
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I know. You know I know. I know you know I know. We know Henry knows, and Henry knows we know it.
[smiles] We're a knowledgeable family.
Princess Alais
Dialogue
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Eleanor: Henry's bed is Henry's province. He can people it with sheep for all I care, which on occasion he has done.
Henry II:
[resentfully] Rosamund's been dead for seven years...
Eleanor: ...two months and eighteen days. I never liked her much.
Henry II: You counted the days.
Eleanor: I made the numbers up.
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Eleanor: What would you have me do? Give out? Give up? Give in?
Henry II: Give me a little peace.
Eleanor: A little? Why so modest? How about eternal peace? Now there's a thought.
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[Henry has just announced that Richard will be king]
John: What about poor John? No one ever says "poor John." My God, if I went-up in flames there's not a living soul who'd pee on me to put the fire out.
Richard: Let's strike a flint and see.
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Henry II: The day those stout hearts band together is the day that pigs get wings.
Eleanor: There'll be pork in the treetops come morning.
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Henry II: Now see here, boy...
Philip II: I am a king - I am no man's "boy!"
Henry II: A king? Because you put your ass on purple cushions?
Phillip II:
[makes to leave] Sir.
Henry II: Oh, Phillip. Come now, you haven't got the feel for this at all. When I bellow, bellow back!
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Henry: I want to reach a settlement. I left you with too little earlier.
Phillip II: Yes, nothing is too little.
Henry II: I'm sorry you're not fonder of me, lad. Your father always said, "Be fond of stronger men".
Phillip II: No wonder he loved everyone.
Henry II: I've come to offer you peace.
Phillip II:
[smiles] Piss on your peace.
Henry II: Your father would have wept.
Phillip II: My father was a weeper.
Henry II: Fight me and you'll lose.
Phillip II: I can't lose, Henry — I have time. Just look at you — great, heavy arms, but every year they get a little heavier. The sand goes pit-pat in the glass. I'm in no hurry, Henry. I've got time.
Henry II: Suppose I hurry things along. Suppose I say that England is at war with France.
Philip II: Then France surrenders. I don't have to fight to win. Take all you want — this county, that one — you won't keep it long.
Henry II: What kind of courage have you got?
Phillip II: The tidal kind — it comes and goes.
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Phillip II:
You — you made my father nothing. You humiliated him, beat him down in every war, bellied with his wife, you played mock the monk — and you made him love you for it. I was there. His last words were to you.
Henry II: He was a loving man and you've learned nothing from him.
Phillip II: I've learned how much fathers live in sons. A king like you has policy on everything. Tell me, what's the official line on sodomy? How stands the crown on boys who do with boys?
Henry II: Richard finds his way into so many legends. Let's hear yours and see how it measures up.
Phillip II: I was 15 when he found me. He took me hunting. I had fallen from my horse, and I awoke to Richard touching me. He asked me if I loved him — "Oh, Phillip, do you love me?" I told him yes, and do you know why I told him yes?
[with relish] So that someday I could tell you all about it. You cannot imagine what that "yes" cost me. Imagine snuggling up to a chancred whore and pulling your lips back into something like a smile and saying, "Oh yes, I love you and I find you beautiful." I don't know how I did it.
[Richard bursts forth from behind the curtain]
Richard: NO! It wasn't like that!
Phillip II:
[coldly] Oh, but it was.
Richard:
[hurt] You...you loved me.
Phillip II:
[amused] Never.
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John: A knife! He's got a knife!
Eleanor: Of course he has a knife, he always has a knife, we all have knives! It's 1183 and we're barbarians!
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Henry II: I want no women in my life.
Princess Alais: You're tired.
Henry II: I could have conquered Europe - all of it - but I had women in my life.
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Henry II: We're in the cellar and you're going back to prison and my life is wasted and we've lost each other... and you're smiling.
Eleanor: It's the way I register despair. There's everything in life but hope.
Henry II: We're both alive... and for all I know that's what hope is.
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Prince Richard:
[the sons - in the dungeon - think they hear Henry approach] He's here. He'll get no satisfaction out of me. He isn't going to see me beg.
Prince Geoffrey: My you chivalric fool... as if the way one fell down mattered.
Prince Richard: When the fall is all there is, it matters.